


Secrets Never Stay Secrets

by fan7869



Category: NCIS: Los Angeles
Genre: Dark Past, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Shock
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-05
Updated: 2014-04-05
Packaged: 2017-12-31 13:14:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1032105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fan7869/pseuds/fan7869
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Secrets from Nell's past come back to haunt her. She wants to handle it on her own, but what happens when the team leader finds out. Can he convince her to let him in and let them help.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

I do not own NCIS LA or and of the characters

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

She stands at the kitchen counter in her apartment and holds the letter in her shaky hands and just stares. Unwilling to believe the words that she's reading, so reads them again and again, hoping that maybe they will change. Finally they sink in. The dread. The realization that in her hands, is the letter that she was hoping she would never have to read. That she would never receive, and all she can think is how the hell could this happen.

This is the last thing she needs right now. She was finally getting to a place where she feels comfortable, where she feels safe. She just wants to forget about the letter and pretend like it never happened. She doesn't want to have to revisit her past. Relive all the horrible things that happened. GOSH, what will the team think of her when they find out. If they find out. That was one of the things she was hoping would never happen. Would they treat her differently? Would they she her differently? And she tells herself no. They won't. Because they will never find out.


	2. Chapter 1

He's sitting at his desk filling out some long over due paper work when two familiar voices fill his ears. Kensi and Deeks are bickering about something again.

"Deeks, I can't believe you! Never mind scratch that. I can believe you, because only you would do something so low."

That's when he finally looks up to see them entering the bullpen coffees in hand and he wonders what Deeks could have possibly done to piss Kensi off.

"You know what? I don't see why you have a problem with it."

Now Callen is leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed across his chest with a smirk on his face. "Okay. What did Deeks do that gives me the displeasure of having to listen to you two arguing at this early in the work day already?" Callen asks trying to hold back a smile.

"This one over there," she says pointing to Deeks. "asked out the girl who gives us coffee at my favorite coffee shop."

"And." he says urging her to go on.

"And? What do you mean and?"

"I mean why is it such a big deal?"

Kensi's mouth is slightly open and is now staring at Callen like her point is oh so obvious. "Are you kidding? I'm never going to be able to show my face again at that coffee shop. Deeks is going to go out on a date with her, sleep with her, only to never call her. And then when I want to get coffee at my favorite cafe I won't be able to because I'll be known as the girl who was with the guy who never called."

Deeks covers his hand over his heart in mock hurt "Wow. I didn't know you thought so low of me. I don't think that's your problem at all."

"Really? Then what is my problem?"

"I think your jealous!"

Callen is grateful at this moment that Sam finally walks in. "Morning! What's these two arguing about this time?" He asks playfully.

Kensi lifts are arms up in annoyance and says "You know what never mind. Forget about it." and sits down at her desk in defeat and gets ready for the days work. 

"Okay then." is all Sam says.

At this point Callen is barely able to hold back a smirk, and now they are all starting on the paper work at their desks. That's when she walks in. Trying to ignore the fact that she's late. Not as peppy and fiery as usual. Actually she looks pretty down, distracted, and tired. That's when he calls her out. "Morning Nell." He sees her flinch slightly in surprise as she hears her name being called out. He furrows his brow when he sees her hesitate to stop and turn around. Eventually she does but not before putting a smile on her face. If he hadn't been watching her so intently these past weeks, for reasons not so platonic, he wouldn't have noticed how fake it was compared to her usual smile. That thought made his brow furrow even more.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Part 2 - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

'Just another day at the office.' that's what she keeps telling herself when she walks into work that day. She knows she's late so she's hoping that no one will notice. She can just slip into ops and get straight to work like she was there at the time she was supposed to be, but of course nothing in her life seems to be going as planned right now.

"Morning Nell." she hears Callen call from the bullpen stopping her in her tracks. She considers continuing walking and pretending she doesn't hear him, but he's a trained federal agent. He's not stupid. Plus that would be rude she thought, so she turns around and flashes him a quick smile.

"Morning Agent Callen."

She turns towards ops about to make take the first few steps on the stairs when he speaks again. "Your in later than usual." Only this time when she turns around he is out of his chair and making his way slowly towards her. Everyone's attention is on her now.

"Yeah sorry. I... Um... I had some unexpected business to take care of this morning. I'm sor-"

"Nell it's okay I didn't mean to call you out on it. I was just wondering that's all."

"Well then if that's the case then can I head up to ops I'm already late enough."

"Yeah sure." With that Nell all but runs up the stairs to ops.

"Well that was a little weird." Deeks pitched in.

"Yeah..." Callen answered slowly still watching Nell's retreating form.

By the time Nell gets up the stairs her heart is racing and all she can think is 'Oh god he knows. How could I think I could hide anything from him.'

'Something's up, but what?' Callen thinks. That wonderful whistle interrupts his thoughts. He follows the sound to see where Eric is standing holding his tablet. "We've got a case."


	3. Unraveled

The case was solved pretty easily. Just a 'typical' murder case of a navy officer. Turned out the wife did it. She found out he was having an affair with another woman when he went away.

"Let's all go out for drinks. You know celebrate a case well done after a long day of work." Kensi said.

"Yeah that sounds like a good idea." Deeks replied. Just as Nell and Eric descended down the stairs. Nell was staring at her phone and seemed far away.

"Hey guys." Callen said. "We were just gonna head out for a couple of drinks. Wanna join us?"

"Um.. I would, but I made plans for tonight." Eric replied.

"Ah. Got a hot date eh?" Deeks asked with a smirk and a raise of the eyebrows."

"I guess you could say that." Eric answered with a smile. "Anyways I better get going. See you guys Monday." And with that he left.

"Nell, what about you?" Deeks asked. She was barely aware of the conversation going on around her as she was twirling her phone in her hands and staring the ground in front of her.  
"Huh?" She asked when she realized she was being spoken to.

"We were just asking you if you wanted to head out for drinks with us?" Callen repeated with a worried frown directed at her.

"Oh... Uh."

"Come on after all you were the brilliant one who figured out he was cheating on his wife." Sam pitched in.

"Thanks, but, um... I was just planning on heading home. Not really in a bar mood ya know."

"Oh come on Nell. You can't seriously leave me being the only girl with these two guys and Deeks!"

"Hey!" Deeks exclaimed, which got everyone laughing.

With one last glance at her phone, thinking about whether she should go or not she finally decided. "Okay." She could do with the distraction. Plus part of her didn't really want to go home for fear of what she would find.

"Yay!" Kensi said excitedly. "This is gonna be so much fun! Shall we?" she said as she pushed everyone out of the doors.

\- - - - - - - - - - - Part 2 - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

At the bar the team sat at a booth a good distance between the bar, the dance floor, the other utilities that the bar offered, and the door. On one side sat Deeks, Callen, and Nell at the end. The other sat Sam and Kensi, with Kensi sitting on the outside across from Nell. The conversation flowed freely between the group. 

They were all well onto to their second beers or third for a few. Everyone was talking to each other, even though Callen kept an eye on the petite redheaded analyst sitting to his right. She however still had her phone in her hands and was in a conversation with Kensi, until Nell's phone started vibrating. Nell looked down at the phone in her hands and frowned because she didn't recognize the number, she didn't think much of it, so she put it away in her back jeans pocket. She then continued on with her conversation with Kensi.

Then it happened for the second time. She took the phone out her pocket with a puzzled look on her face. She realized it was form the same person who had called not even a minute ago, and then the number finally registered.

The number had the same area code as him. She immediately paled and her hands started shaking but she got it under control. She couldn't break down here. She hoped that Callen hadn't noticed her suddenly going quiet. 'How did he find me? When I got that letter in the mail. I was hoping it wasn't true. That I could at least buy myself a little time, How did they find me so fast? How did he find me so fast? Are they here in LA? Already? This isn't good. Why now?' She thought.

She must of been staring at her phone for a while, because now everyone was looking at her. "Nell? You Okay?" Callen asked worriedly. He had been watching her for a while and noticed how pale she had suddenly gotten.

"Yeah. You look like you've seen a ghost." Deeks said.

"Um... yeah sorry just got a little distracted." She said, eyes never leaving her phone. Hoping that her voice didn't give away how scared she was. Though of course Callen and Sam both picked it up, being trained federal agents and all, and gave each other worried, confused glances. 

Her phone rang again and she was just looking at it. "Aren't you gonna get that?" Callen asked her after the third ring.

"No." Nell said. And then she pressed the decline button, sending the person on the other end to voice-mail. Then they all went back to their conversation except for Callen, who kept looking at her. Clearly she was trying to ignore and not look directly at him.

Nell could feel Callen's eyes pouring into her body, and she tried her best to ignore it but she couldn't. He tended to have that effect on /her. After all she did have a small secret crush on the senior agent in charge. Eventually she gave in and turned to her left and their gazes met. It was like he trying to force information out of her with his eyes. She knew she should look away, but she couldn't. His blue eyes were just so mesmerizing. She rolled her shoulders in a way of showing she was clearly uncomfortable and nervous, but he still held her gaze. They only looked away when her phone vibrated. She immediately stiffened. Then slouched her shoulders, and excused her self from the table.

Sam looked at his partner and they did that thing that they always do where they have a secret conversation with their eyes. Sam gave Callen one simple raise of the head towards the direction in which Nell left, that said 'go check up on her'. And Callen replied by nodding indicating that he knew just what he had to do. So he excused himself saying he was going to go get another beer from the bar.

He walked over to the bar staying out of Nell's sight and ordered his other beer. Being just close enough to hear what she was saying into the phone, but not close to hear what was going on on the other end.  
'How did you get this number?' he heard her speak into the phone. He raised his eyebrow up in curiosity and worry and moved closer so he could hear better.

'What do you want?... I don't want anything to do with you!... please... Just go back, leave me alone... we can pretend like this never happened, you can forget about m-... why now?... couldn't you just move on, find someone else... You're going to have to be a lot better if you want to find me, which you won't...' then she hung up.

She had her hand against the wall for support, head in the crook of her elbow, clutching the phone over her heart, and was on the verge of tears when he found her in the hallway.

"Nell?" he asked softly careful not to scare her, which didn't work well because she turned around so fast that it made him wince a little bit. He could see a stray tear that managed to escape and wanted so much to just wipe them away with a brush of his fingers, but something told him now wasn't the time. "What's wrong? Is everything okay?"

"... Yeah... Everything's fine. I'm just not feeling to good."

"Oh.. Okay let me take you home-"

"NO!.. I mean.... I can just take a taxi. You don't have to take me."

"Nell if you aren't felling well then I'd feel better if you'd let me take you home so I don't have to worry about whether you made it home safely or not." Felling grateful that most of the alcohol from the 1 and half beers had worn of enough to be able to drive.

"Okay." Giving in to Callen's offer since she wasn't sure she really wanted to take a cab anyway. She'd be safer with Callen. She hoped he wouldn't ask questions. At least not yet, not when she's like this.  
Callen sent of a quick text to Sam saying he was taking Nell home and not to worry. He wasn't sure if it was the few beers she had had, or the weird phone calls, or if she actually wasn't feeling good, but she was so out of it, he practically had to carry her out of there she was leaning on him so much.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - Part 3 - - - - - - - - - - - -  
In the car Nell kept replaying the conversation she had on the phone earlier.

'How did you get this number?' She had no idea what to do so she just said the first thing that popped into her head.

'Now now little Nell, that's not the way to treat someone after such a long time. But then again, you always were a little feisty one weren't you.' The man with a Russian accent on the other end of the phone said, finished by an evil chuckle.

'What do you want?' She said getting a little impatient and scared as the memories started coming back.

'You know exactly what I want you little red headed bitch!' The man said harshly.

'I don't want anything to do with you!' she said in a pained whispered scream.

'To bad! I'm gonna get what I want. I always do.'

'Please.' she pleaded in a barely audible voice.

The man on the other end laughed.

'We can pretend like this never happened. You can just forget about m-'

'Forget about you! Oh how I wish I could. You should of thought of that before you ran away you arrogant little bitch! Now you're going to pay.' he screamed.

'Why now?' She couldn't help the stupid questions, it was what she was trained to do.

'Do you have any idea what you're little game did to my business.'

'Couldn't you just move on, find someone else.'

'You were one of a kind. Did you really think I was going to let you get away that easily. I have to admit you sure are something. And now I'm gonna get you back.'

'You're going to have to do a lot better then that if you want to find me, which you won't.'

'Oh my dear, but I already have.' And with that the line disconnected and she stood there clutching the phone to her holding up most of her weight against the wall trying to get her self back together.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - Part 4 - - - - - - - - - - -  
Callen watched as Nell constantly kept looking behind them through her side view mirror. The fact that she felt the need to check to see if they were being followed made him feel uneasy. Something was up with their little intelligence analyst. She was clearly in trouble. He wants so desperately to help her, but she won't talk to him. Clearly letting her come to him wasn't working, so he switched to the only tactic he knew.

"Nell what's been going on with you?" He knew now was not the time, after all she was a little shaken up, but when is there ever a good time to interrogate someone.

"Nothing. What makes you think anythings wrong." She answered as evenly as she could at a time like this.

"Well for starters you came in late this morning. You've been jumpy all day, you barely took you eyes of your phone the entire night, and you've clearly been avoiding someone's phone calls." Stating the obvious.

"I guess I can see why you'd be worried, but honestly nothing's wrong." she said as she opened the car door since they had arrived at her apartment complex."Thanks for the ride."

At this point Callen was frustrated and had had enough of her dodging his questions. He got out of the car and followed her all the way up to her actual apartment. When he finally caught up to her she was getting her keys out. Her hands were shaking so much she couldn't even get the key in the key hole. 

He watched her try and get the key in until it finally fell out of her hand. He was there grabbing it before she even had time to react. That's when he realized she had started to cry. He opened the door for her and then got them both inside quickly, shutting the door behind them.

"If nothing's wrong then how come you're crying Nell?"

She hadn't even noticed she was crying until he mentioned it and she immediately started whipping at her face, back facing him. She didn't want him to see her.

He stood there patiently and watched as she went around the house and checked each room, made sure all the windows and doors were properly locked, just how she had left them. Then she walked over to the kitchen and started heating some water in a kettle for tea. "Want some tea?"she asked.

"No Nell I don't want some tea. What I want, is to know what the hell is going on! What are you.... Who are you so afraid of?" He said quickly correcting himself.

"It's nothing really. Just let it go." she said pleadingly, hoping he'd catch the hint and drop it. Which he did.

He slowly walked over to her and held her as she cried onto his shoulder. "Shhh... Nell it's okay. I'm here for you. We're here for you. You know you can talk to us right?" He asked making gentle, soothing circles on her back with one of his hands.

He felt her stop shaking and pull back a little to look at him. "I know." she said, giving him a small reassuring smile. Then she frowned and added. "Just not about this. Please just let it go." Then she stepped back fully out of his embrace.

He started taking a step towards her and she held a hand out stopping him mid-step. "Please, you should leave." she said. 

He frowned and looked down at her. Offended that she didn't trust him enough with what was going on in her life. The look in her eyes made him back off. "Okay, I'll leave. Just promise me that you won't let this get to far and come to me when you're ready to talk about whatever it is."

She answered him with just a small nod, her arms wrapped around herself.

He hesitated leaving her but didn't want to overcrowd her so he obeyed her wishes.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - Part 5 - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
Callen walked out of her apartment building and stopped in his tracks as he spotted a suspicious black SUV near the street corner. Just as he stopped, the car quickly pulled out of the parking spot and sped down the street driving right past him and he realized that it didn't have any plates.

That's when he started wondering if maybe Nell was right to be checking if they were being followed. But he checked. He always checked, and they weren't. That must mean that whoever they were, must already know where she lives.

So, following his gut, he called Sam and read him in on what he had found out.

He decided to sleep in his car outside of Nell's apartment building, check for any suspicious activity, that way if anything happened he'd be there.


	4. chapter 3

Chapter 3 Part 1

Last night, was a tough night for Nell. She kept waking up in the middle of the night with nightmares. The only thing that helped her sleep was seeing Callen's car still outside of her building at 2 am.

She thought it was kind of sweet of him to stay outside of her building, but she also felt bad that she made him feel like he had to.

Callen woke up to a knock on his passenger side window. He turned his head to see Nell's face in the window waving a hand and holding something with the other.

He walks out to the other side of the car and she hands him a cup of coffee. Then walks away. When she realizes he's not following her, she turns around and tilts her head towards the door directing him to follow her.

When they enter her apartment he notices she's still in her robe and her hair is wet from the shower she took. 

He took a seat down at the counter, and they just stare at each other for a moment. He watches as she opens her mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. Finally one of them speaks.

"I'm sorry."

"For you what? You have nothing to apologize fo-"

"Yes I do." She interrupted."I shouldn't have acted that way last night. You were just trying to help."

"If anyone should be apologizing it's me. I shouldn't have pushed you to talk."

The room goes silent for a little while and they just sit there sipping on their coffees.

"You know you didn't have to stay." she says. It was more of a statement than a question.

"I know, but I wanted to." Which was true. He did want to stay.

"Why?"

Callen wondered if he should tell her about the car he saw outside just hours ago when he was leaving, but after seeing her yesterday, he decided against it. "Because Nell, after yesterday, I didn't want to leave you alone the way that you were. So I stayed outside, so if you needed me I'd be there." which wasn't false, so it wasn't like he was lying to her.

'That's so sweet,' she thinks. "I never really thought you cared."

"Of course I do Nell, how could you think that?" He said moving his hand to her arm in a comforting manner, feeling bad that he had ever made her feel like he didn't care.

'Did he just say what I think he just said?' "I know it's just, never mind, it's silly.-"

"Nell," Now he was standing next to her, with his hand on her chin, bringing her to look up at him. "Listen to me. I care about you, you're a part of my team, and I consider you my friend. I hope you consider me one too, because if not then that just makes this whole entire conversation awkward."

She laughed and flashed him one of her famous smiles. "Now there's that beautiful smile."

His eyes drifted of from her eyes to her lips for a second then back to her eyes and he started to slowly lean forward.

He was leaning towards her and she took a quick glance at his lips. All she was thinking was 'Oh my gosh he's gonna kiss me.' She forgot about everything else. For a moment it was just the two of them.

He was going to kiss her. Their lips were barely inches away from hers. Then it happened.

"Beep, Beep, Beep." His phone rang.

She huffed out a sigh of annoyance. He flashed her an apologetic smile.

"Beep, Beep, Beep."

"Callen..." 

"Yeah hang on a second," he said as he walked out of her apartment.

"G, did she tell you anything?" Sam said.

"No, whatever it is she doesn't want to talk about it. I'm going to wait until she's ready to talk to me."

"Yeah that sounds like a good idea. I got a bad feeling about this G."

"Me too Sam, me too. Hey did you find anything about what I asked you earlier?"

"No. Like you said the car had no plates, and we lost him after a few cameras. I'm worried about her."

"So am I Sam. I better get back inside before she comes looking for me."

"Wait. You spent the night." Callen could hear the smile in his partner's voice.

"No."

"Oh really?" Sam said unbelievably.

"Yes Sam. It's not like that. Anyway, I better get going."

"Call me if you learn anything?"

"I will. Bye."

Chapter 3 part 2

"Callen?" She asked once he came back from his conversation outside.

"Yeah?"

"When we went out for drinks last night, I left my car at HQ, and I was hoping you could bring me so I could get it. If you don't mind?" She asked.

"Yeah sure. I can do that, and it's not a problem Nell."

"Great! Thanks. Let me just get changed first and then we can head out." and she pointed to the direction of her bedroom behind her, then turned around.

Callen took that opportunity to look around her apartment see if he could find anything. He saw a lot of pictures of family. And other things. He picked one of them up. It was taken of her whole family on Christmas not to long ago. Nell was wearing this Christmas sweater and she looked so adorable.

"You ready to go?" He turned around to look at her. She had changed into a tee shirt with a blue phone box on it, a skirt and flats.

"Yeah I was just looking at some of you're pictures. You have a lot of them."

"Yeah," walking over to where he was standing. "That one's my favorite." she said taking the one he was holding from him and passing her figures over.

"You miss them?" Already knowing the answer.

"Yeah I do." Putting the picture back in its place. "Anyway. Lets get going."

It all happened so fast.

They were walking out of the building and he saw it again.

The car. Only this time, as soon as it saw Nell exit the building it started speeding down the street. The passenger side window opened. Just as the bullets started flying he pushed them both back into the building.

By the time he pulled his gun out to fire back at them the car was already to far away.


	5. Discovery

"Nell are you okay? Are you hurt?"

"Um.... I... I don't know... I don't think so." She was in shock, confused, scared and a little angry. She'd almost gotten Callen killed.

Callen checked her, and found that one of the bullets had grazed her thigh. It didn't look to bad. 

"Come on lets get you back upstairs and patched you up."

Nell tried to get up but only ended up whimpering in pain. She clearly couldn't walk, so he picked her up bridal style and carried her up the stairs, grateful that she only lived on the 3rd floor.

He opened the door and brought her to sit on the toilet seat in her bathroom. Looking through the cabinet under the sink he found her first aid kit.

He was cleaning out her wound when he heard her say it. "I'm sorry." It was barely even a whisper. If it hadn't been really quiet he wouldn't have heard her.

"It's okay Nell. This wasn't your fault. But whatever's going on, Nell you need to tell me. I draw the line here when you start getting shot at."

"I'm sorry."

"Nell would you stop apologizing already."

"No. Because I am sorry. For getting you into this. I just thought I would have more time. And now you're kneeling on my bathroom floor. Bandaging my leg, because I couldn't take care of this by myself. You could of gotten hurt, or worse. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if you had."

"Nell I didn't get hurt okay. I'm fine. None of this was your fault. But now I have to know everything if I'm going to be able to keep you safe. So start from the beginning."

She started sniffling and she was trying to hold back tears. Some of them slipped and he brushed them away with his thumbs.

"Here. Take these." He said holding out 2 pain pills. She stared at them hesitantly. Then swallowed them both down with a sip of water.

She let out a shaky breath. "So, guess I don't really have a choice now do I."

"No. not really."

"Gosh. It's just I wasn't expecting to have to do this so soon." There was a short pause and he cold practically hear the gears turning in her head. "If I tell you, you have to promise me not to say anything to anyone else. I don't want you to pity me like everyone else, or be ashamed of me, I just want to make sure things won't change between us after I tell you this."

So that's why she was really afraid of telling me anything. "Nell I promise. Nothing could ever change the way I see you."

There was another pause and he saw her hesitate again, so he reassured her.

"I promise."

"Okay. So... wow... okay. Two days ago I got a letter in the mail from someone from my past. Someone I had met during a very dark time who said he would contact me if someone ever started to look for me. His name was Ivan Kamenev. He was Russian. I met him after I escaped from a man named Konstantine Sokov."

"Wait... Sokov. Why do I know that name?" He felt like he had heard that name from somewhere before, but he couldn't pin point where.

"You should. He's a major Russian crime lord. Suspected in at least half a dozen murders, drug, arms, human trafficking, and the sex trade."

Chapter 4 part 2 

Callen was having trouble believing what she was telling him. He didn't want to believe that his little Nell could even get close to being involved with such awful people. Wait a second. His little Nell? When did he start think she was his.

Once all the information she had thrown at him sunk in, he asked the question he'd been meaning to ask. "How'd you ever get involved with a guy like Sokov?"

"I was sold off to him to use in one of his 'underground' businesses. Then I escaped after 3 years."

"Nell I'm so sorry this happened to you." Then he hugged her. When he pulled back he kept his hands on her arms. "That doesn't explain why he;s after you now."

Nell looked down at her hands. "Before I got out I took some money. Sokov really likes is money."

"How much money did you take exactly?" He asked slowly.

"Just enough to get me out of the country, and keep me going for a while until I got settled."

"Nell?" He asked warningly, urging her to be more specific.

"15 grand." she whispered, but it came out as an inaudible mumble.

"What?"

"15 GRAND OKAY! I TOOK 15 GRAND FROM A DANGEROUS TRAFFICKER AND 5 YEARS LATER HE DECIDES HE WANT'S WHAT I STOLE BACK!" She screamed so loudly it made him jump back.

"Nell it's okay. You did what you had to do. We can protect you!"

"See that's just the thing! You can't. Konstantine has a lot of man power. He has connections. It's amazing that I managed to hide from this long in the first place."

"Nell I'm putting you in protective custody and it's not up for discussion." He said turning around and moving to get out his phone.

"No! Please Callen. Don't. He has people. Dirty cops. Everything he needs to find em even if i was put in protective custody, I still wouldn't be safe." She begged moving towards him now. She put her hand on his elbows in an attempt to get through to him.

"Nell I need you safe. They know where you live. They can try again any time they want."

His eyes were desperately pleading her, she couldn't say no. "Fine, but if I'm going to be in protective custody, I want it just to be our team that know about this. I can't trust anybody else."

"Okay. No one has to know about this but us. I have to go call this in, you gonna be okay?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine Callen."

He walks out of the room to call it in. He also asks Eric to look into Ivan Kamenev and Konstantine Sokov. Hetty informs him that the safe house will be ready for them in an hour.

"Nell you should start packing a bag of clothes." He said walking towards the bedroom again. "Hetty says the safe house will be ready in an h-"

Nell was changing in her room, probably because her clothes from earlier got a little bit of blood on them. She was standing by her bed in just underwear, and was holding a pair of pants in her hand.

"OH MY GOSH!" She through the pants at him aiming for his head but missed. Then she grabbed a pillow from then bed and put it in front of her body so that it covered her.

"Oh. I am so sorry. I didn't know you where changing." and started heading back out.

"Wait, actually I.... never mind" Then she mumbled something under her breath about just wearing another a skirt.

"Okay then. I'll let you finished getting dressed." He was almost out the door when he remembered. "Oh and don't forget to pack a bag."


	6. Safe haven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long to update. :( It was never my intention. Trust me. I don't like it when I read a fanfic and the writter never updates too. I hope you like it. Please review. Advice and comments are always helpful to me. Thank you.

Chapter 5 part 1 (Safe haven)

At the safe house

They hadn't got very far from when Callen called in after the shooting, until Eric called at a little close to 7. The information wasn't very good.

Nell was sitting on the couch in the safe house, on her tablet. He walked towards her.

She looked up from whatever she was doing on her tablet. "Hey, what did Eric find out?"

"Nell, um, how exactly did you and Ivan meet?"

"Why?"

"Because Eric did some digging, and I just wanted to know how well you knew him?"

"Would you just tell me what you found out already?"

"Well, you probably didn't know this, but Ivan and Konstantine's went to High School together."

"What!?! Ugh! Of course they did!" She said sarcastically. "But you don't think he?" She asked hoping that he wasn't saying what she thought he was saying.

"Yes. I do. And from the looks of things, It sure looks like he did." He replied trying to think of the best way to tell her what Eric had told him. "Sokov and Ivan reconnected a while ago. Being old high school buddies, it looks like Sokov and him to find you. Somehow Sokov must of found out that he had helped you get away. He probably forced him to give him the information he wanted. And that's how he found you. Five days ago Ivan went missing. And two days ago his body was found in a warehouse. Gunshot to the head."

"Oh God. But something still doesn't make sense. I never told him where I was going to be here in LA. How did he find out?"

"I really don't know Nell." Then he went and reached for her hand, and held it, rubbing comforting circles on the back of her hand.

"I'm feeling kind of tired. I'm going to go to shower and head to bed."

"Yeah that sounds like a good idea. Get some sleep. Today's been a tough day."

"uh huh." she got up and started for the bedroom.

"Goodnight Nell."

"Night Callen." and with that she was off and a few moments later he heard the shower running.

Callen was left alone to ponder his growing feelings for Nell. He cared for her, he knew that much. He wasn't really sure exactly what he felt for her, or what she felt of him.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Nell took a shower and changed into her pajamas. Pulling the covers she got into bed. She wasn't expecting sleep to come as easy as it did, only it didn't last long.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I open my eyes, and everything hurts. What ever I'm sitting on is cold. Everything is so bright. I bring my hands up to my face so I can cover my eyes, only I can't. I find that my hands a tied tightly in by rope.

I'm scared. I try to free my hands from their bonds, but they're too tight, and it only hurts to try, so I stop.

I take a look of my surroundings. I'm in a cage, only about 4x4, in a small room with no windows, and only one door.

I hear sounds. I can't make out exactly what they are. I smell cigar smoke and other disgusting smells.

Me legs are getting numb. I try to switch into a more bearable position.

Bad idea. Pain shots throughout my whole body.

I hear a depraved laugh. My blood runs cold. I turn to face it's owner. I scream. A scary man with blond hair, a tattoo in his shoulder, and a jagged scar on his chest, is laughing and coming towards me. I think I hear him say that he can make the pain go away, but all i can focus on is what's in his hands.

He kneels in front of the cage I'm in and reaches for me. I scurry to the farthest corner away from him and keep screaming.

I feel his hands on my arm in a death grip, dragging me towards him, and I scream louder.

"NO!"

Chapter 5 part 2

Callen is sitting on the couch keeping guard of the inside of the house.

"NO!"

He runs over to Nell's room, gun drawn. He opens the door to the bedroom in the safe house that Nell is currently occupying. Scanning the room for an intruder or anything out of place, all Callen finds is Nell  
trashing, screaming in her bed. He can tell that she's still asleep, obviously having a nightmare. He walks up to the side of the bed contemplating the best way to wake her up.

The decision is made for him when she starts thrashing harder, and almost hits her head.

He tries to restrain her arms, but she keeps fighting him. 

"Nell." He tries to get through to her, but she doesn't seem to even have heard him over the sound of her screams.

"Nell!" He tries louder. "Wake up."

That's still not working and if she doesn't wake up soon they both could get hurt with the way she's kicking and punching.

"Nell. It's okay you're safe." He sees a hint of recognition on her face, so he keeps going. "Nell. You're safe. It's me, Callen. Everything's going to be okay. You're safe."

Her violent movements slowly come to a hault, but she's still groaning in her sleep.

He brushes some hair out of her face, and tries not to think of how soft her hair and skin feel under his fingers. "It's okay." He repeats. "You're safe. I'm here. You're safe."

A moment later her eyes flash open, horrified hazel eyes gazing into blue ones. A few stray tears fall down her cheeks. He wants nothing more than to be able to brush them away, but in her current distressed state, he doesn't want to scare her more than she already is.

She kept hold of his eyes as if they were her life line and they were dragging her back to the present. 

Once she finally found out where she was, she brook eye contact and lifted herself into a sitting position, looking everywhere but his eyes.

"You were having a nightmare and kept kicking. Figured it would be best to wake you up before you hurt yourself." Callen says to break the silence.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?" he asks wishing she would quit apologizing already.

She still won't look at him. "I don't know. You shouldn't of had to see that." 

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asks her hesitantly. He know that whenever he has nightmares he doesn't want to talk about them, but maybe she does, so he asks.

"No."

He doesn't want to push. "Okay." He wants to make sure she knows that if she ever wants to talk, that she can talk to him. "If you change your mind, I'm here. You know that right?"

She finally turns to look at him. Giving him a small smile of thanks. throwing herself out from under the now tangled covers, she gets up.

"Where are you going"

"I'm not going to be able to go back to sleep, so come on."

She grabs his hand and drags them both over to the couch in the living room. She plops down on the couch and pats the spot next her, motioning for Callen to sit. He does as she outspokenly said.

Taking the remote off the coffee table, she turns the TV on. The only thing on this late at night, or more like early in the morning are a bunch of infomercials, but he doesn't call her out on it. They just sit there on the couch in silence watching some guy try to sell them a ShamWow.

Minutes later he feels a warm weight against his shoulders and he looks over to find Nell fast asleep. Her breathing is even and calm. So calm that he soon falls asleep to the dim light from the TV and the feel of her warm breath against his neck.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

Sam walks in the next morning to find them cuddled up on the couch under a blanket. The display brings a smile to his face. He quietly exits, giving the two some time before he wakes them up.


	7. more to the story

Chapter 6 (more to the story)  
Nell wakes up to a warm, solid mass under her. She tilts her head just a little so she can see Callen's face. He looks so calm and peaceful. She reaches up to trace his jaw. He leans into her touch, even in his sleep. That combined with the feel of his stubble under her fingers makes her stomach pinch. He starts to move under her, clearly about to wake up, so she moves her hand away, closes her eyes and pretends to still be asleep. She feels a hand on her arm pulling her closer to him and then the hands fingers start to rub patterns on her arm. She doesn't think he's aware of what he's doing and the thought brings another pang to her stomach. His hand slides over to her back and rubs in a soft soothing pattern. A sigh escapes her lips without her say, and suddenly it stops, and she knows that he is awake now.

"Nell?" She hears him whisper, trying to find out if she is awake or not.

"UMM?" She replies, priding herself in how half asleep she sounds.

"We fell asleep on the couch last night."

She pretends to be just waking up, and looks around. "Oh."

He unwraps himself from her and she swallows the sound of protest threatening to come out at the loss of his warmth.

At that same moment Sam walks in. 

"I was just about to wake you guys up." Sam says, giving Callen a knowing smirk.

"Hey Sam." Says Callen.

"G."

"Morning Sam." Nell says happily from her spot on the couch wrapping herself in the blanket.

"Sleep well?" He's trying hard to keep the smile off his face, and is doing a good job actually, but if it wasn't for the fact the he and Sam have been partners for years, he wouldn't have noticed it.

There is silence for a short moment, and Callen looks over to look at Nell.

"Yup. Great." She finally says. Sam notices her over enthusiasm, but they all decide to ignore the elephant in the room.

"Well, I brought food and coffee." He says, placing the bags and the drink tray on the island in the kitchen.

"You're a life saver Sam, thanks. I'm starved."

Both the men smile at that, and watch as she get ups from the couch, taking the blanket with her. She sits up on one of the stools by the island and smiles up at them.

Sam gives Callen a look that say 'We need to talk' and Callen tells her, "We'll be over there if you need us." He points in the direction of the door that lead to the backyard.

"Why did you guys sleep on the couch."

"We just fell asleep watching TV Sam. It's nothing."

"Whatever you say G. You guys looked pretty comfy there."

"Do you have anything of actual importance that you'd like to tell me?" 

'He's deflecting, that's okay,' thinks Sam.

"Did you find out anything new from her?"

"No. Nothing yet." He looks back at Nell.

Sam recognizes that as Callen's thinking face.

"What are you thinking G?"

"How much money did Nell say she stole again?"

"15 grand."

"To a guy like Sokov, that's nothing."

"You right. That's, what, 5% of what a guy like Sokov makes in a year."

"Exactly."

"Why would he go through all the trouble of going after her, 5 years later just for that? Either she lied to us, or..."

"Or she took something else too." Finishes Callen for him.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

When they walk back in Nell is done eating breakfast, even though there is still like half a bagel on her plate, and is nursing her coffee.

"Hey, so any new leads on Sokov and his men?" Nell asks once she sees them.

They must of had a mad news look on their faces, "What's wrong?"

Callen wants to ease her worry. "Nothings wrong Nell. There are just some things that don't add up. We still have a few unanswered questions."

"What did you take from Sokov?" Sam asks.

She looks confused."I already told you,-"

"No, Nell. We know there was something else." Callen says. "We know you're not telling us everything."

Nell looks over at Callen and he nods, urging her to to tell them. "I took some of his drugs,... and,... I,......."

She was struggling to get the words out and her hands were shaking. Callen didn't care what Sam thought. He took her in his arms. She got on her tippy toes and whispered in his ear, "I killed his brother." Callen's   
eyes widened, and he looked up at Sam who wore a shocked expression.


	8. Oops

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for disappearing for so long, but I'm back now.

Nell pulls out of his embrace. "I didn't mean to do it. He got in the way, and it just happened."

She tries to wiggle out of Callen's grasp as tears fill her eyes, but he won't let her. He pulls her back to him and hugs her. 

"Shhh. It's okay. We know you didn't want to. You didn't have a choice." Callen looks up at Sam and they have a silent agreement.

He lifts her head up so that he can look into her eyes, and says, "It's okay, but from now on you need to start telling us everything. She nods, and he brings them over to the couch, Sam following close behind.

"Start from the beginning."

She takes a moment to regain herself. "Well, about eight years ago, as you probably know, I was sold off to a guy named Konstantine Sokov. Three years I finally had a plan that would get me out. That plan didn't go as I planned. When Konstantine and Dmitry found out my plan was already in action. Dmitry caught me and he tried to take me back, and we fought. He was on top of me, there was a knife by the ground, I reached for it, then I stabbed him, I grabbed what I could and ran."

"Okay," says Sam,"but why take so much money and why take the drugs?"

There was a moment of silence and Callen could tell she had to dig back to dark place when she was telling the story.

She runs her hands through her hair, "Um, when I was with Konstantine, he'd give us drugs. You know, show off his product," She lied. "get people to buy them. I got addicted, I had needed the drugs at the time. But when I finally got out, and I got clean and I'm fine now."

Sam nods his understanding. She's had to go to a dark part of her past to tell him this, so he stops asking questions. She's been through so much, but she hasn't let that get in way from living her life.

"I know this is hard for you Nell, there is still something you're leaving out," Callen said. "We'll do everything in our power to make sure he doesn't get to you."  
"While I was there, there was a girl, Tahlia. I guess you could say that over our time there we befriended each other. We came up with a plan to escape.   
Sometime the day of the escape, she must have told Konstantine about our plan. She turned against me. I don't know why. We were so close to getting out. You can guess what happened from there on out." Nell search both Callen and Sam's face. She could see the question on there faces. "Before you ask, no, I don't know what happened to her. My guess is she was probably made Konstantine's new favorite. Turning me in earned her some serious points on his scale."

"So, Tahlia turned against you. Konstantine sent his brother after you, you killed him, stole money and drugs. Then what?"

"I may or may not have set the place where he stores some of his drugs and money on fire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you like and continue reading. Reviews are always helpful.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been a very long time, but I hope you guys will continue to read this story. Honestly, I think the reason why I left it for so long was because I wasn't sure how I wanted this story to continue, but since people are still reading it, I will try and reignite the spark that had me write it in the first place.   
> WARNING: This chapter contains some violence and hints at a non-con scene, though it is not that detailed.

Previously on Secrets Never Stay Secrets:

"So, Tahlia turned against you. Konstantine sent his brother after you, you killed him, stole money and drugs. Then what?"

"I may or may not have set the place where he stores some of his drugs and money on fire.”

Chapter 8

“Callen what I did put him way behind. It wasn’t just the setting drugs and money on fire. I was, I was Konstantine’s best girl.” She says the word with disgust and venom. “He and his men, his… clients, us girls were not just for show. They did whatever they wanted to us.” She’s ashamed of the things they had her do. The alternative was dreadful and horrifying. She shivers at the   
memory.  
\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
It’s been 3 months since I’ve been here though it feels like forever, locked in this cage like and animal. This place is sickening. The first week I hadn’t eaten, but then I learned that if I was going to be held here with no way out, that I might as well stay somewhat nourished. The man with the scar on his chest comes in with food 3 times a day. That’s the only thing I’m grateful for, at least they are keeping me alive. I really wish they weren’t though. The food is not the only thing that he gives me. Every day he comes in with a needle and injects me with it. At first it was just once a day, then 2 twice a day, and now it’s whenever he feel I need a boost. It almost makes the pain that I’ve felt inside since being here.

Today he comes in smelling like drugs, smoke and sex like always, except today he’s wearing a suit, the familiar needle in hand. 

He crouches down beside the cage, and tries to stick the needle in my arm. I struggle as usual, not as much I used to considering that a part of me wants the drug. I hate that part of me. He grabs me harshly and jabs the needle into my arm. It hurt more than usual. 

“It wouldn’t have hurt so badly had you just been a good girl,” I hear him say. The drug seems to be acting faster, because soon I’m starting to feel my loosening. My body starts to relax against my will. “See. Don’t you feel better now?” I know he doesn’t actually want me to answer that question. “Now time to test the merchandise shall we.”

He unlocks the lock on the handle to the cage and helps me up to my feet. I’m a little wobbly standing on my feet from being held up in a tight cage for months. He’s practically carrying me, I’m leaning on him so much. I couldn’t run away if I tried, which I do. That earns me a smack across the face. It doesn’t hurt as much as I expected it to.

He drags me out the door of the room I’ve been held up in for so long and into another room. I notice that this room isn’t like the other rooms. This room has a room with a big bed with red sheets in tacky animal print.

My brow furrows in confusion, but then suddenly everything becomes clear when he pulls me into him and kisses my neck. The feel is disgusting. His revolting odor fills my nostrils. I try to fight him of as best as I can. I pull my arms out of his grip and hit his face. My nails scratch into my skin, leaving a scratch by his jaw. ‘That will probably leave a scar,’ I think.

“You Bitch!” I hear him yell. I try to make a run for it again. When am I going to learn? He grabs my arm. “This would hurt so much less if you just stop fighting me.”  
He slaps me, throws me onto the bed and climbs onto me. He kisses my neck, then my lips and silent tears spill from my eyes.


End file.
